Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Who Will I Be?

I had a trippy thought today.

I was looking at before & after pictures of people who have had bariatric surgery and lost 100+ pounds and I thought, hmmm, that's who they really are as I looked at their thin pictures.

Then I realized that I don't know who I really am.

Some people know their thin selves, as they b

ecame overweight in adulthood. They know what they're travelling back to. But I've never been thin. I was always an over weight child who grew into a morbidly obese adult. I've never seen my "thin self." Ever. I hope I have a "thin self!"

And of course, there's the inner self that goes along with the thin self that will also be different...it has to be different. Living inside of a body you like (finally) has to make your inside self different.

I'm on a journey to someone I've never met.

Trippy.

1 comment:

Can Opener Boy said...

Hey there EvWo,

For 18 months or so, we had a young woman live with us. Along the way, we had a number of discussions about weight and identity.

She is 5'1" or so, and (I'm guessing) weighs between 250-300#. She hates herself, and has it fixed in her mind that she needs to be thin in order to like herself. We tried on more than one occasion to impart to her that she is able (and needs!) to like herself irrespective of her weight. Sadly, she never was able to embrace that truth.

It strikes me that you are already way ahead of the curve on this one. I liked the way you put it for your journey:

"Living inside a body you like (finally) has to make your inside self different."

It isn't that you are hoping to like yourself once you are thin -- you decided to do this surgery because you already dolike yourself!

...but now you are at a new level of realizing and anticipating the changes ahead. That is just really cool!

You go EvWo!!!!

~ Keith